Emotional Reactions Are Not Beyond Your Control - Believe Me
You experience emotional reactions to people, events and circumstances each and every day. Have you ever stopped to consider that you might be able to influence and change those very familiar reactions? Well you most definitely can!
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If you react to specific stimuli time and time again, you are literally re-acting, as in acting again. This action is an established pattern that is stored within your subconscious that gets triggered by that particular stimuli.
How Resistance Patterns Take Shape
For example let's say that as a child you were criticised by a teacher for being poor at mathematics:- Your emotional reaction was to feel terrible.
- You felt judged as a failure.
- You bottled up all of that emotion because you were scared to say what you really thought to the teacher.
- You didn't mention it to your parents because you didn't want them to know you were a failure.
The negative emotion simmered within you and felt very uncomfortable so you decided that you would deploy an avoidance strategy to ensure that you didn't experience that painful judgment again.- You hated mathematics and especially your mathematics teacher.
- You accepted that you were a failure at mathematics and decided to avoid it all costs.
With this avoidance strategy or resistance in place, you had accepted that your self confidence had been severely dented, and you had primed yourself to re-experience a very negative emotion every time the subject of mathematics appeared into your experience.
Another example:
At school you were asked to read out a passage from a text book in class. You felt a little self conscious but you were pleased to be given the opportunity. You mis-pronounced a word and some of your classmates broke out into hysterical laughter. You felt terrible, embarrassed and ridiculed. The pattern was set in your subconscious. Speaking in public equals ridicule and therefore an avoidance strategy was required. Now in your working life the requirement for you to present an aspect of your work to your colleagues is presented to you. How do you feel?
Time To Pay Attention To Your Emotional Guidance System
Your emotional reaction is one of terror. You desperately want to avoid this scenario but you know that your boss will be insistent. Panic ensues.
You Are Paddling Upstream (For more information CLICK HERE - Opens new window)
You cannot control what your boss does but you can control what you think, believe and feel.
Let us revisit the first example: What really happened in that mathematics classroom, or more importantly what was your experience of mathematics before then? Had the importance of mathematics been presented to you in an engaging way? Had you understood the relevance of it to everyday life? Had you practised it in the context of something that was important to you? The answers are almost certainly NO. - Problem: You had not discovered a passion for the subject, and without that
Desire
your natural capability and understanding was not permitted to rise to the surface.
Solution: Tomorrow if you were engaged in a project that you were really passionate about and it required some mathematical understanding to enable you to progress you would quickly develop the desire to learn. - Problem: You had therefore not devoted your
Focused Attention
on the subject matter and not internalised some of the basic concepts.
Solution: Tomorrow your exciting project would cause you to really focus your attention on the mathematical challenge and you would easily learn what to do. - Problem: When you were judged as a failure you were happy to
Believe
it and you have never questionned that judgment since.
Solution: Tomorrow your belief in your project will override your false historical belief in you as a mathematical failure, and you will release the resistance and perform to your best.
Tomorrow your emotional reactions to the same stimuli will be completely different
because you have become aware through application of the Empowerment Process that how you think, believe and feel is under your own control and always has been.
Your control over your reactions will be rapidly advanced when you familiarise yourself with:
- The Silent Witness
- The Value of Appreciation
- The Benefits of Managing Expectations
- Having Faith in the Universe
To explore other examples of how emotional reactions can be managed please visit the following pages:
- Passion
- Anger
- Depression
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